Dear Penthouse...

1Fast400 Forums > Off Topic

Posted by: BIGPOPPA Jul 13 2007, 04:30 PM

Since we don't have enough threads on here about sex I'm starting an other one. Let's hear your best "Dear Penthouse" story.

Mine took place last summer after my grad party. Most people had already left and I was fooling around with this girl in my buddy's basement on his couch. After like 5 mins I tried to go down her pants and she was like "No, I'm a good girl".. So whatver we kept fooling around and of course around 3 minutes later I tried again and got shot down again! So I was like fuck this and laid on my back, took of my pants and started JO. She was like "What the fuck are you doing?" I told her Hey Im fuckign horny if we're not gonna fuck I need to get rid of this hardon before I go to bed.. It only took like 30 seconds for her to be like "Alright Alright let's have sex."

Shitty thing is I tried the exact same thing a second time with this other girl that didn't wanna have sex and it didnt' work.. I just ended up JO and than leaving.. haha.. so just some advice if you ever try this it probably won't work with most chicks

Posted by: Roids Jul 13 2007, 09:12 PM

Hey, at least you got a nut both nights. That's all that matters. If the second chick wasn't down for it, hell with her. She still had to watch you JO. So you still get full points for both encounters. Good for you!

Posted by: Doogsy Jul 14 2007, 04:59 AM

I cant believed that worked! At seems she wasn't such a "good girl" after all

Posted by: willpiazza31 Jul 14 2007, 08:05 AM

"good girl" yeah right

Posted by: Roids Jul 14 2007, 09:13 AM

QUOTE (willpiazza31 @ Jul 14 2007, 08:05 AM)

"good girl" yeah right

There's no such thing as a "good girl". They're all sluts on the inside.

Posted by: Doogsy Jul 14 2007, 10:45 AM

QUOTE

They're all sluts on the inside.

Pitty its really difficult to get that girl out

Posted by: AK87 Jul 14 2007, 12:14 PM

lmao great story
i have a similar one

altho it was my gf not some random
but she didn't want to put out anymore cuz she thot i was just using her for sex (which I was)
so were fooling around n shes like i dont want 2 do anything this time we always just fuck around
so im like ok
and i whip it out and start JO and she started 2 go nuts
next thing i know shes goin to town on the sausage

Posted by: Roids Jul 14 2007, 12:52 PM

So it turned her on to watch you JO? Interesting. My ex gf used to like watching me JO also. She used to masturbate in front of me two, which was a major flippin' turn-on.

I was with this chick for a one-nighter years ago. I was pumpin her from behind (not in the ass) and I was like "i'm gonna cum". So, she says "wait wait!" She then turns around and goes down on me and swallows every drop. I was like holy shit! Many chicks won't even suck you off after you've been in them.

Posted by: BIGPOPPA Jul 14 2007, 01:27 PM

QUOTE (Doogsy @ Jul 14 2007, 10:45 AM)

QUOTE

They're all sluts on the inside.

Pitty its really difficult to get that girl out

You're what 18? Just wait a couple more years my friend. Once you start going to clubs and stuff it won't be hard at all

Posted by: miggyg Jul 14 2007, 01:54 PM

i find its a 50/50 if girls will suck me after i been fucking them...I love it when they do... Best is when your APing and your like im going to cum and all she says is blow over my tits!!....im all about the titty shots! Only once gotta bust on a chicks face and it was an Ex an for my bday...i saved for like 4 days hahahah poor girl never let me bust her face again.

Posted by: Roids Jul 14 2007, 02:08 PM

That's awesome. I've never had a chick that was into facials or tit blowouts. Most of them avoid the stuff like it was poisonous.

Posted by: cc-10 Jul 14 2007, 02:13 PM

QUOTE (miggyg @ Jul 14 2007, 02:54 PM)

the girl ive been fucking here lately screams i just want you to cum all over my tits ...i just want you to cum all over my tits..... kinda like christmas in july

Posted by: miggyg Jul 14 2007, 02:23 PM

QUOTE (cc-10 @ Jul 14 2007, 02:13 PM)

QUOTE (miggyg @ Jul 14 2007, 02:54 PM)

the girl ive been fucking here lately screams i just want you to cum all over my tits ...i just want you to cum all over my tits..... kinda like christmas in july

my ex even used to get real dirty and tell me to pull out an blow on her butt!! also very classy!! then id roll over an nap while she went an showered ahhaah

Posted by: Big_Ben Jul 16 2007, 10:46 AM

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 13 2007, 10:12 PM)

, nice.

I had this chick that had the hots for me in college, I saw her at a club one night out with her friends and drunk off her ass. We freaked in the club and she invited me back to her place, I had nothing better to do. So we got back to her place, first thing she does is say she wanted to take a shower, and took off her clothes in front of me. Then turned and looked back with a nice inviting smile, bent over and slid off her pantys. So I took my clothes off and proceeded to the shower with her. Turned on the water, next thing I know she goes down on me, then I go down on her. Towel off and its off to the bedroom. She tells me to start however I want in her pussy but to finish in her ass. So I fucked her on her back on the edge of the bed me standing, turned her on her side and fucked her sideways, turned her all the way over and fucked her doggystyle, then started getting that tight feeling in my nuts so I pulled out and stuck it back in her ass. Rode her for about 3 minutes and that was all she wrote! And she moaned for me to cum in her ass, she kept saying she wanted to feel me cum in her ass.

Took another shower and did it again, but put her on top since I got my work in. Then after about 25 mins she turns cowgirl and put me in her ass again, and within 5 mins I blew again. After that it was another quick shower and lights out for me. Woke up in the morning, to her blowing me and bent her over and rode her ass one more time. She made pancakes for us and then I got the fuck out!

We had a few more fuck sessions after that, then she started getting to emotionally attached so I broke it off. She was hot, but not 100% what I was looking for.

Posted by: Roids Jul 16 2007, 11:28 AM

I could almost JO to that story, but I'd prolly get fired since I'm at work.

Posted by: BIGPOPPA Jul 16 2007, 03:44 PM

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 16 2007, 11:28 AM)

I could almost JO to that story, but I'd prolly get fired since I'm at work.

hahaa. word.. great story ben

Posted by: willpiazza31 Jul 16 2007, 03:45 PM

What kind of syrup did she have for the pancakes?

Posted by: willpiazza31 Jul 4 2008, 10:52 AM

Posted by: Roids Jul 4 2008, 11:20 AM

I wonder what happened to some of the originals around here (Btrice, hrdgain81, vettman, vanity, etc). Vanity's prolly muncing on a bratwurst somehwere.

Posted by: OmniRed Jul 4 2008, 12:17 PM

Edit, i think my gf reads these posts from time to time..

Posted by: willpiazza31 Jul 4 2008, 12:21 PM

Did your mom help her "clean" up?

Posted by: OmniRed Jul 4 2008, 12:24 PM

QUOTE (willpiazza31 @ Jul 4 2008, 12:21 PM)

Did your mom help her "clean" up?

no... thats fucking sick..

oh god.

Posted by: hadi_D Jul 4 2008, 01:04 PM

I hate when your fucking Doggy style and you pull a damn Cramp! Since then I fucking Strech before hand! Oh and just want to say that with one arm, I am still a beast! Lately I have been with this girl regularly. She is mad at me though, cause I cant commit. I was asking her about ever getting a Vibrator and she says," My whole body Vibrates for you!"

Posted by: PotentiallyFatal Jul 4 2008, 01:37 PM

I already told u guys about some of my most memorable escapades in other similar threads...so here's the highlight reel.

1. Getting head from 2 sluts in the washroom at a booze can, girl #1 slips falls and gashes head on paper dispenser, I immediatly busted all over girl # 2 then left the scene I recall.

2. Smoking crack with black gangsta whores. Nothing more romantic than dropping hot pipe screens on a bitches weave whiles shes blowing u and smelling the plastic burn.

3. Fucking an 18 year old asian transsexual in the ass at a crowded rave out on the dancefloor. I know I'll catch flak for this one...get over it. I actually got so smashed that night and ended up pissing on his/her white x-dresser friend that I didn't like so much "can you open up and say ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fag?"

4. Smashing the gums of a toothless hooker...who told me she was 35...but I swear she looked 60.

ttfn.

ftw!

Posted by: hadi_D Jul 4 2008, 01:49 PM

QUOTE

2. Smoking crack with black gangsta whores. Nothing more romantic than dropping hot pipe screens on a bitches weave whiles shes blowing u and smelling the plastic burn.

3. Fucking an 18 year old asian transsexual in the ass at a crowded rave out on the dancefloor. I know I'll catch flak for this one...get over it. I actually got so smashed that night and ended up pissing on his/her white x-dresser friend that I didn't like so much "can you open up and say ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fag?"

4. Smashing the gums of a toothless hooker...who told me she was 35...but I swear she looked 60.

You should seriously consider keeping some of this shit to yourself. I mean, Tranny's, Crack, 60 year old toothless hooker? What are you doing with yourself? Any morals???

yeah, I'm just bust'n on ya! Be careful bro, I know we only live once, but how long do you wanna live?

Posted by: PotentiallyFatal Jul 4 2008, 01:58 PM

QUOTE (hadi_D @ Jul 4 2008, 01:49 PM)

QUOTE

look whos talkin mr 'giv'r on crotch rocket'...we only live once true. I got both arms and NO stds and only fuck my fiancee nowdays.

PS: I *had* no morals...things have changed since then. It was all about staying high, paid and laid.

Posted by: goodskie Jul 4 2008, 03:39 PM

ben, what bar was this at and what apartment complex. I need a better idea of what this was like. maybe I've had a similar night

my guess is either a thursday at waldos, a friday at firehouse, or a saturday at wayside

Posted by: Roids Jul 4 2008, 05:09 PM

QUOTE (PotentiallyFatal @ Jul 4 2008, 12:58 PM)

QUOTE (hadi_D @ Jul 4 2008, 01:49 PM)

QUOTE

I swear to god I'll never get tired of PF's material. Seriously, just when you think a thread couldn't deteriorate any further/sleazier, enter PF!!!!

Posted by: goodskie Jul 4 2008, 06:06 PM

morals? fuckin a crack whore doesn't hurt anyone. they both had fun. fuck it

Posted by: Arnoldclone Jul 4 2008, 07:28 PM

No such thing as a "Good Girl" They all want it.. They just need to be like men and admit it.

Posted by: willpiazza31 Jul 4 2008, 09:42 PM

Word. PF's stories are awesome. Nothing wrong with his actions.

Posted by: Roids Jul 4 2008, 09:56 PM

QUOTE (goodskie @ Jul 4 2008, 05:06 PM)

morals? fuckin a crack whore doesn't hurt anyone. they both had fun. fuck it

Nothing wrong with fuckin a tranny either if she/it's cute I reckon.

Posted by: Arnoldclone Jul 4 2008, 10:02 PM

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 4 2008, 09:56 PM)

QUOTE (goodskie @ Jul 4 2008, 05:06 PM)

morals? fuckin a crack whore doesn't hurt anyone. they both had fun. fuck it

Nothing wrong with fuckin a tranny either if she/it's cute I reckon.

uhhhhh.....sure?????

Posted by: Roids Jul 4 2008, 10:05 PM

QUOTE (Arnoldclone @ Jul 4 2008, 09:02 PM)

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 4 2008, 09:56 PM)

QUOTE (goodskie @ Jul 4 2008, 05:06 PM)

morals? fuckin a crack whore doesn't hurt anyone. they both had fun. fuck it

Nothing wrong with fuckin a tranny either if she/it's cute I reckon.

uhhhhh.....sure?????

I didn't make that up. PF loves trannies. Just ask him.

Posted by: goodskie Jul 4 2008, 10:09 PM

lol wait did you fuck a guy then? I won't judge you I still think its funny just clear things up

Posted by: Arnoldclone Jul 4 2008, 10:13 PM

I was once jo to a tranny....till I learned it was a tranny....when the pic I clicked exposed hisers penis.

Posted by: Roids Jul 4 2008, 10:32 PM

QUOTE (goodskie @ Jul 4 2008, 09:09 PM)

lol wait did you fuck a guy then? I won't judge you I still think its funny just clear things up

Not me. Potentially Fatal fucked a tranny. He's proud of it too.

Arnoldclone, did you go ahead and finnish after you realized it was a tranny? Come on now, be honest!

Posted by: OmniRed Jul 4 2008, 10:39 PM

omg... I cant believe he threw out the "i got both arms and no STD" into the mix.

Posted by: Roids Jul 4 2008, 10:41 PM

QUOTE (OmniRed @ Jul 4 2008, 09:39 PM)

omg... I cant believe he threw out the "i got both arms and no STD" into the mix.

And this is the same cat who got all pissed off at me for talking shit about Islam.

Posted by: Arnoldclone Jul 4 2008, 10:42 PM

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 4 2008, 10:32 PM)

QUOTE (goodskie @ Jul 4 2008, 09:09 PM)

lol wait did you fuck a guy then? I won't judge you I still think its funny just clear things up

Not me. Potentially Fatal fucked a tranny. He's proud of it too.

Arnoldclone, did you go ahead and finnish after you realized it was a tranny? Come on now, be honest!

Impossible, Im may be a sick fuck at times, but cmon bro, try it, to me you just see a dudes face, without all the makeup, and it aint like one of those butter face things. You can just ignore the face, and look elsewhere, no matter where you looked your fucked.

See it like this

You look at the face, and youre gonna be like dam, This really is a dude...

Look at Hisers Tits, and youll see its junk and face outta your vertical peripheral vision (that a word) and really see a dude..

And you look at her junk, then well....guess what?

Posted by: PotentiallyFatal Jul 4 2008, 11:37 PM

QUOTE (Arnoldclone @ Jul 4 2008, 10:42 PM)

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 4 2008, 10:32 PM)

QUOTE (goodskie @ Jul 4 2008, 09:09 PM)

lol wait did you fuck a guy then? I won't judge you I still think its funny just clear things up

Not me. Potentially Fatal fucked a tranny. He's proud of it too.

Arnoldclone, did you go ahead and finnish after you realized it was a tranny? Come on now, be honest!

thhere was no junk! at least i didnt see or feel any

and he had real tits...not huge ones, but proportional to his tiny frame...

and this asian was petite and feminine as fuck...hot lil number started grindin and riding my cock slipped the g string to the side and i smashed hishers whatever i blew wad up innit too! i never kissed the bitch and i was laced on pcp and really just wanted to see if i could hurt the lil queer but heshe fucking loved it...admittedly i wondered if i was gay for a few seconds then went to the back of the party and washed my cock off with the rest of my beer- i was scared of the aids

Posted by: Arnoldclone Jul 4 2008, 11:39 PM

QUOTE (PotentiallyFatal @ Jul 4 2008, 11:37 PM)

QUOTE (Arnoldclone @ Jul 4 2008, 10:42 PM)

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 4 2008, 10:32 PM)

QUOTE (goodskie @ Jul 4 2008, 09:09 PM)

lol wait did you fuck a guy then? I won't judge you I still think its funny just clear things up

Not me. Potentially Fatal fucked a tranny. He's proud of it too.

Arnoldclone, did you go ahead and finnish after you realized it was a tranny? Come on now, be honest!

thhere was no junk! at least i didnt see or feel any

and he had real tits...not huge ones, but proportional to his tiny frame...

and this asian was petite and feminine as fuck...hot lil number started grindin and riding my cock slipped the g string to the side and i smashed hishers whatever i blew wad up innit too! i never kissed the bitch and i was laced on pcp and really just wanted to see if i could hurt the lil queer but heshe fucking loved it...admittedly i wondered if i was gay for a few seconds then went to the back of the party and washed my cock off with the rest of my beer- i was scared of the aids

Oh dear god.

I also wondered if I was gay for reading this one.

Posted by: goodskie Jul 5 2008, 01:39 AM

what?

is that when you came?

Posted by: OmniRed Jul 5 2008, 03:20 AM

oh christ.

Posted by: Big_Ben Jul 8 2008, 01:31 PM

QUOTE (hadi_D @ Jul 4 2008, 02:04 PM)

Nice catch bro! Good to see you are still rockin' it! Looks like she's got some nice hourglass hips which also means she's got an ass that don't quit! Lookin GQ in that suit!

Goods, it was back in the day when Kegger's was still in biz on a Thursday nite, the apartment complex was right off campus inbetween it and the frat houses. They are like a Blueish Gray color, parking in between buildings.

Potential, you're crazy man but damn those sound like some wild nights. I think I'd be too scared of the crackwhores though!!! But if one is ready to go down on you, what are you really gonna say no?!!

Posted by: Regulator Jul 8 2008, 11:52 PM

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 16 2007, 11:28 AM)

I'm at work.

...old threads...

Posted by: Christoph22123 Jul 9 2008, 05:11 PM

QUOTE (PotentiallyFatal @ Jul 4 2008, 11:37 PM)

QUOTE (Arnoldclone @ Jul 4 2008, 10:42 PM)

QUOTE (Roids @ Jul 4 2008, 10:32 PM)

QUOTE (goodskie @ Jul 4 2008, 09:09 PM)

lol wait did you fuck a guy then? I won't judge you I still think its funny just clear things up

Not me. Potentially Fatal fucked a tranny. He's proud of it too.

Arnoldclone, did you go ahead and finnish after you realized it was a tranny? Come on now, be honest!

thhere was no junk! at least i didnt see or feel any

I hear a beer is good at washing off aids

Posted by: tree33 Jul 9 2008, 05:18 PM

QUOTE (Big_Ben @ Jul 8 2008, 01:31 PM)

QUOTE (hadi_D @ Jul 4 2008, 02:04 PM)

Not "no" but "HELL NO"!!!! Thats what I would say anyway, too many clean girls out there that will do the same.